Unreciprocated

Time has rolled by this summer

like a dull, loud, clunking train

slow on the fat tracks, burdened by its carry

My body has suffered because of my emotions

I’ve stuffed them down like a heavy chain cascading down from its crane

landing ungracefully with a clamorous boom

twisting in a punishing snake of iron on the wet concrete port floor

I have resisted my release, resisted my health

(resistance, my only rebellion)

I’m staring at a blank off-white canvas

the bleakness yearning to be painted

begging for shadow and light

but how do I paint a landscape with your absence?

its all cold; the paint comes out in greys and blues

my brush is pointing down, paint is dripping down my leg

I don’t stop it

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