Two fingers

I asked for a Macallan 20 year old Scotch

You told me the 10 was really good

And poured me two fingers in an etched glass

I had just been hiking


Climbing mountains

Over and through the hills

All night long

An epic journey that took me 8 hours my first go

But went so much faster in my dream

Time was cut in half, my breathing, half as hard

I moved around the boulders with finesse and ease,

Like smooth Scotch whisky on my tongue

I’m losing you fast

I lost you

I guess it wasn’t meant to be

I’m here alone now with my thoughts

I used to feel like you were with me

even when far away

But now I feel the cold

I sense the fear and disappointment

I am sorry I let you down

I am sad and dismayed


I ask for another two fingers in my dream

Hoping the smooth fire will warm the ice

I feel inside


I left you on the mountain

You couldn’t come with me

You didn’t want to come

So I left you

Again and again and again

And I’ll leave you still

A thousand million times

As I climb away from you

And what cannot be

I’ll race away from you

Swim dive crawl

A million miles away

Until I can’t feel you at all

Until I can’t feel you at all


(The other you)

The way-back-when you

I dreamed of you last night

A saying good-bye of sorts (finally, right?)

Just a few sunsets later…

You were marrying her (again)

A few of the wedding guests remembered you and me together (back then)

And still believed in us

And argued with dour faces that I was the one

for you

Even your son, in my dream a blond and well-mannered sweet 8 or 9 year old, made the case

He somehow seemed to know

But you didn’t

Or couldn’t

Or wouldn’t

And I found myself awkwardly wondering why I had been invited

to this whole spectacle to begin with

So I will leave you there, awake now

at the country club and ball

And forgive you and forgo you

for another…